So Im Never Having Sex Right

Far out Jayne. What a way to totally stuff with a girl's mind. What do you mean Im never having sex right? Of course IM having sex. Just not the pill. The pill does not maketh the sex. In fact, the pill often does not maketh the woman. That would be because the sex does not maketh the man.

Bullshit. Sex maketh the man. Man cannot live without sex. Men, you see, are total tossers, literally, and euphemistically. Men DO NOT live without sex. Men, live without the pill. And so do I.

The pill is not for me. Its an added hormonal imbalance I do not need. I do not need men either. Cept for possibly our boyfriend. Who I also do not need, but dont mind a whole lot. And in order to not need our boyfriend, I do not need the pill.

I'll tell you what else I dont need. I dont need men who thinketh sex maketh the man. I like sex. I do. I just dont like men who are madeth by sex. Getting lost yet? Yeah. Me either.

So I went out for dinner with my bastard husband this evening. Ok, last evening beings as how this is now this morning. Disaster. You know why? Sex does also not maketh dinner. One of us realises this, the other one of us promptly spat it and insisted that as I had rejected him he best book a plane ticket out of here. Tickets do not maketh the man, specially the ones the man haseth on himself.

But, heres what does maketh the man. Pictures. Yep. Pictures maketh the man. Big pictures. I like big pictures. Big pictures give such a good view of the madeth man. And a madeth man, does not need the pill, thus not needing the sex. Why am I even friends with you Jayne? And who am I kidding. Even with no pill, man needeth the sex. And so do I. Just not with the man who needeth the pill in order to needeth the sex. See, sex is about what two people needeth, not what the man just needeth.

I know where you are going Jayne. I know why Im friends with you. Ive said it before. In order to do something in the messed up mixed up mind of PreciousPrincess you have to work backwards. To go forwards you have to stop going backwards. I know this. GOD DAMMIT I KNOW THIS BUT THAT DOESNT CHANGE THE FACT I STILL WENT OUT FOR DINNER WITH MY BASTARD HUSBAND AND DID NOT GO FORWARDS. In fact, backwards is where I went. WEll, didnt go, and thats the crux of his problem right now. His crux did not go backwards or forwards, or backwards AND forwards which was what his crux would have liked to do.

Sex definately maketh the man. Cos you can tell a man by the way he takes no sex in his stride. Speciallyl when sex was what he had in mind. You ever seen a man who didnt get laid and wanted to be made? It turns from spoil the princess *most definately not the precious one in his eyes at least* into spoil himself. He's been on his ok behaviour while here. Hasnt bugged me too much. Hasnt pissed me off. But you tell a man he aint getting madeth and that all changes in a heartbeat.

I may not be on the pill Jayne, but Ive got plenty of contraception at present. And one of them is our boyfriend. Oh, how does that work Princess? You ask yourself. I'll tell you how that works. Cos why would I wanna sleep with a man who is madeth by not getting sex, when I can happily not sleep with our boyfriend who hasnt had the crudeness about him at all to mention even once that he isnt getting laid by me at all? You dont see our boyfriend giving me all manner of pains in my ass because I havent taken my knickies off for him.

Thought for half four in the morning.......Bastard husband, dont get one. Our boyfriend, keep one. Just the one Jayne. Just the one.