Both of them. The one I get sent to my phone via pocketnews and the one that comes to my inbox via the internet.
Both of them say this morning is great for physical activity, and getting projects done. Then Im supposed to be delicate with the opposite sex this afternoon. What the?
This morning is decidedly fucked far as physical activity goes. I really do have to get a bed. My back is locked up in all manner of strange places, which would be fine if I was planning on keepin the second half of the horroscope plan, being delicate with the opposite sex would be about all I could possibly handle today. But thats fucked too. Do you see any opposite sex around here? Do you see any sex around here? No. You dont. You know why? Cos this preciousprincess went and convinced herself our boyfriend is the one for her, and beings as how their is miles and miles and miles and miles between us, this preciousprincess isnt getting any sex at all. Not even phone sex. And no, half assed attempts by my bastard husband to phone sex me do not count as sex. It counts as an insult. And our boyfriend, hes got manners. Or he's gay. Cos even my nice new webcam isnt getting the action either. And thats ok, cos Im not just some peice of meat, even if my back does feel like it just went a few rounds with a tenderiser. I said thats ok.
Ok, its not ok at all. As if it would be. Holy crap, Im a woman dammit. I have needs too. And you cant go waving your very hot, very sexy self around in front of my webcam and not have me wanna have you wave something else very hot and very sexy around in front of me. Me. Not my webcam, me. Our boyfriend is slowly and softly killing me. Hes so dropped. Hes not dropped dont be silly. He's the nicest man in the whole wide world. Yesterday I happened to mention I went shopping and bought two pairs of boots, one dress, and four shirts. He says.....get this Jayne this is an in your face.....he says....oooh new dress, show me??? Ok, he might be gay. Doyou think he's gay?
He's gay isnt he? Oh god, thats an in my face. Shut up. He's not gay. He's well mannered, respectful and polite. And I just know that under that acceptable exterior there is a passionate man with a hard on just waiting for it to be appropriate to bring out to play. Ok, hes not gay, if he was, he would have asked to see the boots, then enquired as to what size they were.....yeah I can pick a gay man out of a crowd. Hes the only one who says, oh girl love the shoes.
So anyway, Im going shopping again today. Woman can not gt by on love alone. Love may make the world go round, love may be in the air, but sometimes love just isnt enough. Im getting a vibrator.
Thought for today......bullk pack of AA batteries thanks
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