So One Man Can Change The World Right?

Michael Jackson was 'starting with the man in the mirror' in more ways than one in order to change the world. Martin Luther King was one man who changed the world. The man who shot JFK changed the world. One man really can change the world.

And so it is for me. One man has changed my world. I know, I know, your all saying you've heard this before. But this time, my world has changed that much, I cant breathe. I cant think. I cant freaking type dammit without going back and changing all the typos. And I cant get Jayne to answer her damn phone and tell me Im crazy. Which is what Jayne does. But I think even this time Jayne knows Im serious. In fact, I think Jayne knew I was serious before I knew I was serious. I knew this from the seocond I layed eyes on him. And that was just his photo. A photo. And it changed my world.

So I wandered through a singles dating site. As all pathetic ageing alcoholic pathetic women do. Shut up Jayne. I found all manner of men. Hot men. Not so hot men. Men with words that rhymed, men with no shirts on. Actually, a lot of men with no shirts on. A lot of hot men with no shirts on. A lot of dear god not so hot men with no shirts on and a hint of no pants on. A lot of hot men with with words that ryhmed and no shirts on. Let me tell you, there is a lot of men out there with no freaking shirts on. And Im a girl. A shallow girl at the best of times, Ive come to realise. Usually a pretty face, and a lack of shirt is enough for me. But you know what, I passed those shirtless men by. I dont know why, perhaps I'll die. But I did. And then I spotted this photo. Nothing special. A man, laying down on a couch, with his arm propping his head up, and the arm of the couch propping his arm up. He looks happy. He looks like he is watching his kids play. He doesnt have kids though. I find this out later. Not then. He looks fine with the world. He looks, different. He doesnt look at all like a hot man with no shirt on. He has a shirt on. He also has, a look about him. He's beautiful. Realistically, he isnt beautiful. But the photo is. I take the plunge, I send him an email. Beautiful photo I say. Thanks, he says, was at my sisters watching her kids play.......

I dont love him. I want to lick his heart. And have his babies. But mostly lick his heart. Even Jayne is sick of hearing me say it. We email. A lot. We switch to msn. Im drawn to him. Every second of every day I see him in my mind. I see his heart, not his cock. Didnt see that coming did you? Nope. Me either. Either did Jayne. Secretly, I think she did. But shes not a very good friend. She didnt warn me I was in trouble. Ok, she did. She is a good friend, though why Im even friends with her is beyond me.

Today, he phoned me. Again, I couldnt breathe. I couldnt think. I actually said, see, I hear that you are talking but I have no idea what you are saying. He laughs at me. I say, oh dear god you think Im funny dont you? He says, no I think you are gorgeous. I swear to the lord himself that my heart actually grew hands and reached out to grab his through the phone. YOu think Im pathetic dont you? Me too. I dont know whats happening to me. I never wanted to lick anyones heart before. NOt even that bastard greek god I married. All I ever wanted to do with his heart was make sure it existed. Im not certain it does. Not the point. Even that bastard first husband of mine, way back when I was young enough to confuse love with lust, never had me feeling like this.

Im destined for couch time. Dust off your suits people. Theres going to be a wedding or a funeral. Either way, a suit will be worn.

Ps, and you know what? I like it. I like it a lot.

Pps, buddhist who? What? Who???